Boyfriends In Highschool.

Seem almost pointless. Because guys at that age are not mature and serious enough to want a long lasting relationship (well most of them anyway), so it's like you know that your realtionship isn't going to last so what the hell is the point? Just to make out with them and have a good time? I mean I guess that doesn't sound to bad though... Lol 

I just hate this whole girls age faster then guys thing. For me to date someone with the same maturity level they would have to be like 24. Lol and I don't plan on dating anyone over 17 so yeah, that wouldn't work. 

Okay, I currently have a crush right (yes, a new one I am a very confused person stfu) and it's like aww he's so cute and nice blah blah but I bet if I we're to ever end up dating him the same thing would happen with my ex. I mean at least my current crush is actually the same age as me (possibly older idk). 

Mature, nice, sweet loving guys? Where the hell are you? Please come out of hiding and date me, like seriously. Lol Having a boyfriend is so freaking complicated and at times seem like work more then fun. Uhhh why must everything be so difficult? 

It's not like I'm going to stop dating people in High School, I mean it's still fun (well for the most part).

So yeah back to this crush I have. =D 

He's very cute, and seems pretty nice, and this is the first Asian person I've ever had a crush on! Lmao But since his name will stay confidential, his nick name is Lucky Charms. Lol Let me explain. 

Okay, cause everytime me or Jenn get a new crush we will give them a nick name so we can talk about them without anyone knowing. It's just a little funny thing we do. Plus the nicknames are pretty hilarious.

Here's a list of the ones I can remember. 

• Billy
• Orange
• Tigger
• Sunshine
• Cheeseburger
• Ninja
• Lucky Charms
• Dog Food
• Gay Boy Julio
• Bob (very first nickname)

Yeah we get bored pretty easily. Lol

But alright, I'm done here. I'm gonna go listen to Aqua. XD

♥, The Coolest Loser Around, Katie Crowe

Am I Ever Going To Make Anything Of Myself?

I bet you are all wondering... Hmm what does Katie want to be when she gets older? Well ok of course you don't care but... I freaking do! 

And you see the problem is... I have absolutely no idea as to what I want to be when I get older. All my thoughts about a career end up being extremely unrealistic and it's like I'm in freaking fairy tale land or something. Well Katie, (why am I talking in 3rd person?) you better think of something that's actually POSSIBLE. (Isn't talking to yourself one of the first signs of insanity?) Lol Ohhh well

Ok well my unrealistic, but it would super awesome if it happened careers are;

• Professional Musician (such as playing in orchestras for movies and what not)
• Something in Music Management (like working at a record label) I don't even know if you make any good money of that though. 
• Ready for the really unrealistic one? To be a Musician like in a band or a singer. 

So I realize that problem that I have here is... The only damn thing I like is music! Nothing else at the moment seems to interests me enough to have that career for the rest of my life. 

But I mean come on, working in the Music Industry? Like thats ever going to happen. It's so hard to ever even make it into that Industry, no less actually become successful. 

There's other  jobs I could think of but they just don't interest me enough. 

I guess this just proves that music takes up basically my whole life. So I think of this as, if I was meant to be a musician or have anything to do with music, then it shall happen, but if not, well then... I better think of a different occupation. Lol

I have never in my life had such passion and intense feelings for anything but my music. Even when I was in love, music is always there for me, ALWAYS. So I liked it better. (Lol) I might sound like a crazy person but whatever, and no music is not my boyfriend or whatever. Music isn't MINE. It's for everybody to enjoy and love (and hate as well). 

Uhh man, I don't know what I'm gonna do! = Probably just go on Wikipedia <--- (Awesome website btw!) and look up a bunch of occupations to see which one best fits me. 

Random Quote Time!

 

I know this has nothing to do with anything I wrote but, I don't care I like it. Lol 

♥, Katie Crowe

My Blogs Are Always So Serious.

Why so serious? Lol I realize that almost every blog I write is really serious and depressing, lets bring some happiness to this page! =D

Ok well let me start off by saying that I don't currently have a crush on anyone, despite what I said before. He's still really freaking cute though, especially with his new wardrobe. =] But yeah no crushes for me... well there is some random person that I have grown a likely to, but I'de rather NOT talk about that. Lol

*CoughIthinklilwayneishotCough*

Wow, who the hell just said that? Umm ANYWAY.... 

I want to take some time out to talk about someone. I haven't written a blog about her yet even though she is highly deserving of one. 

My Best Friend Jennifer. Hmm where to begin? You are just an amazing friend, I mean you always out up with my bullshit and all my crazy, weird, un-human, psychopath, WTF things I tell you. Lmao

You are a very understanding person and you, unlike most people accept for me for I am, and I really appreciate that. And even though you may suck at comforting and from time to time you can get a little bitchy, you are always there for me in my time of need. I don't know what I would do without you. 

And plus, if I didn't have you who would I tell all these crazy things to?? =] I don't think another human being could possibly handle them.  Lol

But seriously, in a way I think that we balance each other out because you are the more down to earth, think before you do stuff person, smarter person and I'm just kind of a crazy hot mess that cries too much. But we are definitely both big ol' dorks (Ok maybe I'm a bigger one then you, but whatever.) But it's like when you put us together, we make some type of Super Natural Freak of Nature. (In a good way of course Lol) 

All of my other friends in the past always had something wrong with them; alcoholic mother soon to be druggie, racist, loser who thinks cutting herself and smoking is cool, person who barely cared about me... etc. 

It's almost as if looking for a best friend is like looking for a boyfriend although most people wouldn't think of it that way. Friendship is stronger then love at times anyway, well it's more lasting and real at least. So to me it feels like I've been searching forever to find the one best friend that will last, and I really feel like I have found that person. Like we we're meant to be best friends. (Lol, this is all sooo cheesy)

Alright Jennifer, considering I know you are the only person that's going to read this I just want to say that you are a great friend and even though you have your flaws (like totally ditching me in line Lol) you are the greatest friend I could EVER ask for. 

I Love you so much. ♥ 

And we better stay friends forever, because if we don't... I will have to kill you. Lmao j/k. No but seriously you better stay friends with me, and yes that is a threat. =)

♥, Katie Crowe

Why?

Why is life so difficult? 

Why is life so complicated?

Why can't everything just be wonderful?

Why do people have to feel pain?

Why must people cry?

I think every answer to those questions is... Human Kind. 

People in this world are just so focused upon themselves and uncaring of others. And the ones that are loving and caring get shoved around by the evil people in this world.

I may not be the nicest person in the world, but I have good intentions and I care about people. It's just that sometimes it's so hard to care about people when they make it so easy to hate them.

People are cruel, vial creatures. And like any creature, they are not easy to tame. That's how we get rapists, murders and psychopaths. 

I don't care what ANYONE says. I am a good person. Most of what I do is for good intentions and I never try to hurt people, unless they absolutely deserve it. 

It just really upsets me that people say I'm this and that, and say horrible things about me. I hate when people try to tell ME who I am. It's like only I can know that, you don't know what I'm thinking or how I feel. I swear it's like people think they KNOW me. Nobody truly knows me, not even myself....

Sometimes I just want to be like, "Fuck everybody, fuck caring, just fuck everything." It just gets so difficult to deal with living sometimes. (Trust me I'm not suicidal or anything) but why can't everything be okay? Why can't I be happy? Why is it so difficult to achieve this? 

Disney really fucks with kids heads, I'll tell you that. The fucking Cinderella Story never happens. Sure maybe things at first seem like a fairy tale and seem almost surreal. But you just wait and see, I bet you something will royally screw it up. 

Nothing ever seems to work out the way you want it to. It almost seems like for me, when something is going amazingly good,  just out of nowhere something totally destroys it and fucks it up to no end, but I guess that's just how life works... But why?...

I could ask why all day long, but no matter how much I ask that I'm not going to know why, I just gotta accept life for as it is, or get out. (and the second one isn't an option.)

Everyday I try to make the best out of every situation, but I always just come back to looking at all the horrible stuff and realizing how much I really hate this world. I hate being like that....

I don't even feel like writing anymore so I'm done for now.

♥, Katie Crowe